Category Archives: Relationship
Always speak words wise,
That God doesn’t despise.
Always speak words wise,
That goodness you maximize.
Always speak words wise,
That it be good advice.
Always speak words wise,
That kindness you verbalize.
Always speak words wise,
That you’re favored in God’s eyes.
Always speak words wise,
That sincerity you realize.
Always speak words wise,
That avoids any false guise.
Always speak words wise,
That faith in others they energize.
Christ said “Love your neighbour,
As yourself” – a worthy labour.
Love yourself with due respect,
So that charity you then reflect.
How can one, whom for self doesn’t bother,
Be able to sincerely love the other?
And do what Christ commanded,
Nothing too big has been demanded.
Help your neighbour in need,
Instead of being led by greed.
Help your neighbour in sorrow,
To let them be hopeful for tomorrow.
Be a true child of God in action,
Let your good works gain traction.
Pray for your neighbour to live pure,
That for eternity in grace they endure.
Disclaimer: I do not support nor condone child sexual abuse nor paedophile activities. This is not a legal document and is not intended as a substitute for legal advice. This article does not say all church goers are child abusers and paedophiles. This article does not say all church preachers and ministers are child abusers and paedophiles. Remember that child abuse takes place all over the world by even non Christians.
All praise to the Lord Jesus, who said that unless we become like little children we won’t enter the kingdom of heaven. For Jesus desires that we become trustful of God like how young children trust their parents. I pray for the safety and well being of all children in the church and those not in the church too. Amen.
Here are a few to reduce or eliminate child molestation and paedophilia in your local church:
- Never leave children unattended with non family members for too long behind closed doors or restricted spaces.
- Take personal responsibility to ask your children how was their time at church with other people. Try to observe any undue silence by your child and keep asking more questions if needed.
- Respect the innocence and safety of other people’s children like how you would do for you own.
- Have zero tolerance towards any acts of child molestation in your church.
- Have zero tolerance towards all case of paedophilia even if the child was seduced into giving his or her consent willingly.
- Each and every complaint of child molestation can and must be investigated immediately both by church and law enforcement.
- All church members trying to obstruct investigation or hide evidence must be treated as collaborators with the crime. And they must be reported both to the law enforcement and state or city level church authorities.
- An open atmosphere where well being of children must be maintained everywhere in the church.
- If the parents of the victim are cowardly, then other responsible adults should come forward to the help the victim register the complaint. However, this should be done very carefully. As parents can be pressured by the abuser to file counter complaints saying that you instigated their children to file a false case. So in this regard try to get a secure record, preferably on video in which the child mentions that he or she is giving the complaint of their own free will without any force from your end.
- All church members who are adults must be educated to have regard for their children of the church and not ignore their cries for help or tears especially in church.
- People must be made aware that no one in the church must be allowed to neither molest nor seduce children, no matter what rank, gender or social standing that the perpetrator has. This applies to even non Christians who enter or are associated with the church.
- No exemptions for anyone or any group who doesn’t want their names to be reported to law enforcement in cases of child molestation or paedophilia.
- The burden to safeguard children should not be left to women only. Even the men of the family and the church should help the children in such cases.
- All false alarms and false complaints must be investigated and reported to the authorities. However, care must be taken not to generalize all the future complaints as hoaxes but be diligent instead.
- Do not treat every adult as a suspect as this will allow the actual criminals to escape action by the police and church authorities. So in this regard, have a clear understanding of the consequences of your actions.
- Do no falsely assume like the heathen that each church is filled with paedophiles, and go on a punishing spree. Instead be cordial and polite to all church.
- Do not allow any person accused of paedophilia, to get a transfer nor flee the area where the accusation was made. Involve the police in such cases without hesitation. Do note, that these vile people ie the paedophiles may be very dangerous, so exercise due diligence at all times.
- Your local church must have a written document about how the church and its members deal with instances of child molestation and paedophilia. This should specify as to what is defined as child abuse, the course of action to give justice and also how to given relief and welfare to the child. This document should then be reviewed by valid legal experts and law enforcement for any updating that is needed. This document should be available to anyone on demand without any reason being asked for.
- If your local church doesn’t have any such written document approach your preacher or church elders. If they claim they are not interested or don’t have the authority, then ask them to give a written and signed copy of their statements or you record their statements via audio or video devices. And in such cases, keep asking for higher authorities or supervisors who can arrange for the documents and record every statement of their reluctance. This would be useful as a record of the church’s unwillingness to safeguard children’s well being, in case of any unfortunate event of child abuse in that church, which you can submit to the relevant law enforcement.
- This is the most overlooked thing but do pray for children to have safe and pleasant experiences in the church and everywhere. And pray really well at this. Keep in mind that prayer alone is not substitute for personal responsibility and right action.
- Prayer for deliverance of children from child molestors (disciplesofhope.wordpress.com)
- PRAYER: How to Pray for Protection (stephaniespeakson.wordpress.com)
- Reading the news for prayer needs
- Preventing child sexual abuse (preventchildabuse.org)
- Preventing Child Sexual Abuse – How to reduce this risk in your church (www.churchlawandtax.com)
In your walk with Christ sometimes you got be aware of spiritual gray zones. These are areas in which it’s not clear if something is wicked or innocent. It can also be areas where a teaching is not confirmed to be consistent with the Gospel and the character of God. At such an instance its useful to know what a ‘Gray zone’ means.
Meaning of Gray zone: (Noun) An intermediate area between two opposing positions; a situation, subject, etc., not clearly or easily defined, or not covered by an existing category or set of rules. (Oxford Dictionary)
One might wonder that what is so dangerous about spiritual gray zones. Due to highly ambiguous nature of these things its better to give out a few examples. Here we go:
- Mr A, is a Christian guy who wants to do great things for the Lord God. He wants to perform miracles of healing so as to help the sick and dying. Now even after years of going to church, going to Bible studies and having five hours of daily prayer and also, fasting twice a week, he is unable to heal anyone. Suddenly Mr A, gets to know of a secret group that claims to be Christian and say they can teach anyone to heal within 3 days. However their condition is that he donates a very large sum of money to an offshore bank account of theirs and also sign a no refund clause. Further more, they want him to not discuss with anyone in his local church about this. He thinks whether to do a little ‘sacrifice for the greater good’ or if its wrong to not speak to his church people and leaders about this. He gets a call from an unknown number asking him to ‘not delay his conversion from day-to-day but rather donate in the next 2 minutes or his time of ‘grace’ will depart from him forever’. Mr A is now totally confused since he never took down his preachers phone number.
- Miss J, is egged on by her friends to marry a man who is given to womanizing and drug abuse. They claim the only way for this man’s soul to be saved is by Miss J marrying him and using her influence as a wife to preach the Gospel to him. Miss J doesn’t like that idea. But her friends tell her that all preachers tried to bring a change in that sleazy man but nothing happened and say that only genuine love will convince that man to accept the Gospel. She is not aware that her friends are promised a fortune by this impious man who knows that by his character itself, he won’t be able to convince her to marry him. Miss J is scared of using marriage as front to preach the Gospel or to let this man’s soul slip into hell forever.
- Preacher Z, is approached by people of another church. They say they got a gold bracelet with the name of their church on it. And they promise to send him a generous tithe each month as long he wears the gold bracelet on his right hand. Now preacher Z is in need of some serious funding for his new missionary project in Namibia. He ponders that if it’s all a matter of wearing a gold bracelet without any change in what he preaches, then what could possibly go wrong.
Let me explain the dangers of each of the above examples. In the first example, Mr A stands likely to be scammed big time if he donates a big sum of money abroad. And if he later contacts law enforcement or legal resources there is very little scope to get his money back. Also if he were to hide things from his preacher, then when he gets scammed, even the preacher and the church to which he belongs will be surprised at his lack of vigilance and eventually this can affect his reputation.
For the second example, if Miss J were to marry the womanizer, there is no guarantee he will ever accept the Gospel. Besides, when he eventually will cheat on her, none of those scheming friends of hers will help. And if she approaches her church they will offer prayers and sympathies but will find it difficult to mend their marriage.
And for the third example, if Preacher Z takes the gold bracelet, it can bring disgrace and controversy to his church and denomination at large. This holds true especially if the other church that gave the bracelet of gold, turns out to be a cult or a heretical organisation. People can and will think of him endorsing their false doctrines.
In cases of spiritual gray zone’s here’s what you can do:
- Do not act on your impulses but think what could be the long-term consequences. Also think how would you deal with those consequences.
- Do not be over secretive that you don’t take counsel from the right person of God as want to hide things from him or her.
- Do read the Bible on a regular basis. Read the various parts of it pertaining to wisdom and discernment, instead of only going for your favourite verses. This should help you remember the counsel of the Bible if in case there is a very quick decision to make or you don’t have access to a faithful and wise preacher of the Gospel. Reading the Bible regularly needs discipline and setting the right priorities to use your time, though.
- If it’s too good to be real, do not had over money nor time nor your emotions etc to such things or people. Instead research it. If you cannot research it, then like I said earlier don’t be too shy to get counsel from the wise people of God available to you.
- Pray about it for clarity from God. This is where you ask God to deliver from all lies because he the God of truth and not chaos.
Just to let you know, I too faced a very dangerous spiritual gray zone around 2009-2010. I would preach and minister to a growing group of teenagers and those in their early twenties. Some prefer to call them youth or young adults. The point is these youngsters had problems of the spiritual sort; false gods, drinking, smoking, false relationships etc. So myself and some of my contemporaries were given leadership over them. And due to various reasons these youth were comfortable to reach to us for their problems and we would help to come out of their bad habits. We would intercede for them, fast for them and when they are with, lead them in praise and worship of Jesus. This caused lots of lots of youth who at time wouldn’t come to church to come to us instead. It was a nice opportunity for myself to slowly and steadily get them attend church without any forcing.
However, this didn’t sit well in due course of time with the main Christian circle I was in. They accused us of ‘meeting the needs of the youth so that they don’t come to the main body’. They asked to ‘stop preaching the Gospel since that is what fulfills the needs of the youth and this will cause them to reach out to the main body’. It took me a day or two to come to a decision after praying and my reply to them was “Why do you want me to not follow the commandment of God?” So they asked what commandment and I replied “The great commission to preach the Gospel”. Followed by “Woe to me if I do not preach the gospel! (1 Corinthians 9:16)” They were horrified at my reply and asked me will I reconsider and follow their ‘authority’ in this matter and only do praise and worship with the youth. Remembering some of the youth, who said that the main body was not that effective in counseling them, I said no to the main body and that’s the last they interacted with me. Later I found that almost all the youth never ‘integrated’ in to the main body consisting of married adults. My point is, I had to make a decision to follow God’s commandment or the opinions of man, even if that is of the elders when it was all a gray area to me.
Christ be with you, as you overcome the gray areas of your life!
16 These six things the Lord hates,
Yes, seven are an abomination to Him:
17 A proud look,
A lying tongue,
Hands that shed innocent blood,
18 A heart that devises wicked plans,
Feet that are swift in running to evil,
19 A false witness who speaks lies,
And one who sows discord among brethren.
Depending on which region of the world you live in, there’s this odd thing called as Black Friday. I don’t call it religious. In fact this had nothing to do with Christ. On this day people shop like they have never seen a toothbrush before. They wait out of the shopping centres and rush like herds of cattle once it opens in the morning. This year 2017 it’s on 24th November but every year the date may vary but the trend continues.
So the people who will snooze when it comes to stand for their nation will be willing to stand for long hours to get their precious little goods. And the corporates manipulate these people into thinking they are getting things for cheap. May God get people out of their grip!
Remember this, no business sells goods to not make a profit. They are after your money in truth. So any one who goes for such Black Friday sales, is in a delusion if he or she believes that he or she got a bargain. Definitely no bargain price but simply dumping of old stocks before the New year begins.
And to say what I said earlier, people rush in like cattle. But cattle won’t steal each others grass when they are to graze. There are people so vile that they steal from children right in front of their parents. Some use most evil curse words to argue with others. And there are some men and at times women who literally beat others to get the last few stocks of digital gaming devices. Obviously they pay at the cash counter. But my point is that there no need to be a kleptomaniac nor a violent and rude person when going shopping this day. Such behaviour is not fitting for anyone claiming to follow the Lord Jesus Christ.
If you who are reading this have behaved in anyways like this then do repent of such unkind behaviour and be wise going forward. Cut out such behaviour from your life before it takes you to prison or somewhere more worse. And if you haven’t been involved in a Black Friday mess, then continue to be out of it, for your own well being.
[Jesus said;] And if your hand causes you to sin, cut it off. It is better for you to enter life crippled than with two hands to go to hell, to the unquenchable fire. (Mark 9:43)
Helping a person in need is good in itself. But the degree of goodness is hugely affected by the attitude with which it is done. If you show resentment because you are helping the person out of a reluctant sense of duty, then the person may recieve your help but may feel awkward and embarrassed. This is because he will feel beholden to you. If,on the other hand, you help the person in a spirit of joy, then the help will be received joyfully. The person will feel neither demeaned nor humiliated by your help, but rather will feel glad to have caused you pleasure by receiving your help. And joy is the appropriate attitude with which to help others because acts of generosity are a source of blessing to the giver as well as the receiver. (St John Chrysostom)